This Week in Techniques for Winning Ugly

TWiTfWU dissects the debacle that was the Redskins--Bears game this Sunday. Several experts have politely dubbed this "contest" the worst game of football ever played. As a scientist, I prefer to let the numbers speak for themselves, so here goes...

The two teams combined for 4-23 on 3rd down conversions, 6 INTS (2 for TDs), and 8 fumbles (3 lost). Some say that stats don't tell the whole story, but trying to pass these numbers off as anything resembling a respectable offensive performance is akin to trying to make a wookie sexy:

Fortunately for the Redskins, most games don't end in a tie (although Donovan McNabb didn't know that fun fact), regardless of the overall quality of play. In winning ugly this week they have created a blueprint for beating the Bears:
Punt the ball back to the Bears (on first down if necessary).
Blitz Jay Cutler.
Set up your blocking for a Pick-6.

Maybe the most telling example of the level of play in this game was that Bears LT Chris Williams could be called a veritable offensive juggernaut with 1 reception on 1 target for 4 yards.